Not what I expected

When I told Td he wasn't going to steal Sabrina for his crew, I thought that would be the end of it. I thought he'd know better than to say 'yes' if it somehow came up she wanted to work with him on that boat. I hadn't counted on on Imrhien and Sabrina herself not getting the message. 'Brina actually liked the idea.

The flash of anger was far more intense than I'd expected. More than anger. Emotions I didn't even have names for, and some I didn't like having names for. What was happening to me? I could almost understand the fear of losing Sabrina in the Black. After having Caitlin ripped from me, I didn't want to contemplate being left along again like that. But why now? Sabrina was already making the run back and forth between Hale's and Blackburne for work. Why was the thought of her working with Td and Immi shaking my calm? They were both family. I trusted them both. Td's poor jokes asside, I knew he wasn't trying to steal my wife from me. Or my dog for that matter.

In my gut, that was part of what triggered the reaction. Rational or not, it was there. Maybe if he'd asked me to go as more than just a ride along, it might have felt different. He might have too, if his original offer hadn't triggered a defensive reflex.

Between actually talking to Sabrina and a series of waves with Td and Imhrien, I was able to set that irrational fear asside. They needed her. They ultimately needed me too. And the boat wouldn't just be another Aught-three Firefly. No. This one would be breathed upon. We'd used various transports in covert operations before and after the war. Most of them were just standard boats but some were special. Ours would be special.

It might take a little extra time for Sabrina and Uncle Elsoph to get the special projects guys at the yard to convert a surplus Firefly into an Intruder, but they would. Customizing that boat would cost more than the supplies she was bringing in. But that wasn't the point either. With everything we had going on out here, we needed a boat like that. A Matagi or Corsa were fast and capable, but they were recognizable and new built. They got noticed. A Firefly could slip in anywhere in the 'Verse and no one would notice.

It would take someone with Sabrina's skills to maintain a boat like that, and someone intimately familiar with operating on an Intruder. That left me. Where she was, I was. Because, ultimately, if something went terribly wrong I'd rather die with her in the Black than survive alone.

Looks like I'll be flying a Q ship.